Randy Weaver was a big story in the 90’s- he was wanted by the government for selling illegal guns, and was tracked down and subjected to a standoff in which several people were killed, including his unarmed wife by a government sniper. He was defended at trial by superstar criminal defense lawyer Gerry Spence and aquitted. He has since been mostly forgotten.
His daughter Sara Weaver witnessed the shooting of her mother and understandably was traumatized by this. In a 20th anniversary story she tells of forgiving the government sniper who shot her mother. Is unconditional forgiveness- that is, made without any apology or repentance by the wrongdoer- the key to overcoming past hurts? More importantly, is it the right thing to do?
In general, Christians believe that unconditional forgiveness is required for all sins committed against a person. Any ongoing sadness, grief or other psychological pain is thought to come from the failure to forgive. Jesus says any, repeat, any, sin can be forgiven, except the failure to forgive.
The trouble with this is it results in a reductio ad absurdum. The wrongdoer can easily receive forgiveness, simply by confessing and asking for it, and is motivated to do so my feelings of guilt and shame. His sincerity is rarely questioned and he is not required to engage in any kind of penance or provide any compensation. The victim is required to release any demand for justice and not hold the offense against the wrongdoer. The offense can be heinous, and extremely harmful and destructive to the victim, but this does not seem to matter. The wrongdoer can kill the victim, and if the victim does not forgive the offender in the interval between the time the injury was inflicted and their death- as per Maria Goretti– they will go to hell.
(Speaking of which, why is Maria Goretti a saint for doing something she was simply required to do by the plain words of Jesus?)
There is good reason to believe by close reading of the Bible this is not the case, but this is what most Christians believe.